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A LONG day in the ER

I spent 8 1 /2 hours in the ER today! No, there was nothing physically wrong with me! Over the years I have shared some of Hannah’s story with you. Since the beginning of the year both us, her therapists and psychiatrist have seen Hannah going backwards rather than forwards in her behavior patterns. It has been extremely frustrating for all involved. Hannah knows how to behave. She has an amazing team around her trying to provide coping skills etc. that would help her do much better in life. The problem, Hannah does not want to do them and she is almost proud of that fact. SO that leaves Richard, myself and the boys in a very vulnerable position.

For years we have lived with her verbal abuse but even that has become worse this year. (Yes, if you are reading this and know Hannah, you most likely have NEVER seen this side of her.) She has always been volatile, slamming doors and kicking things but we have managed. However as she has grown up (she is now 5′ 6″) it has become harder and harder to handle her. When she goes into a mood/fit/tizzy or whatever else you want to call it, there is nothing that will calm her down until she decides to. (If someone knocks on the door she can switch it off in an instant.) Two to three weeks ago she threw a tantrum when Richard was here. He only just managed to control her. That was her first visit to the ER. A few days later she kicked a hole in the bedroom door. Last week’s therapy session was extremely scary as Hannah agreed with us that she has indeed glamorized Juvenile Detention and thinks that is where she should go! We all assured her that that is where she definitely does NOT want to go! After the session the therapist told me that as soon as she showed any physical aggression to any of us we were to take her to the ER.  (My greatest fear was what she was going to do to get herself put in there!) Today she was screaming at me when I was trying to help her with her Math so I sent her to her room. Whilst she says she really wants to get her schoolwork done so she can go out and play, her behavior doesn’t mirror that want. Not only did she kick me, she then proceeded to try and damage things in the bedroom eventually kicking a hole in the side of the closet! When she does this damage it is very calculated. This morning I could see her thinking about it for a few seconds before actually doing it. If we try and touch her to prevent her doing damage during these times, she becomes even worse.

Richard was at work so I had no choice but to call 911. It has taken Richard way longer than me, as I am with Hannah more, to come to the place of doing this. In his job he deals with SO many time wasters and abusers of the medical system, ones that just use the ambulance as a taxi. Hannah is an amazing manipulator and liar. She will look us straight in the eyes and say she didn’t do something even though we know and have the proof that she did! I am no longer physically able to handle Hannah so there is no way I could take her to the ER not to mention I didn’t have a vehicle! SO out came the police first asking if Hannah would go with them. She told them no as she is scared of police cars! SO out comes the ambulance and off she goes. I had to then go find Daniel, grab his car keys and take his car to get to the ER. SO thankful Michelle was on park to be able to watch Caleb.

What a long and boring day! To cut a long story short, Hannah is now on her way to Lakeland Behavioral Health in Springfield where she will stay for at least 96 hours. Richard was insistent that she be admitted somewhere this time as he is very concerned for the welfare of Caleb and myself when he is not around. He also knows what Lakeland is like, having taken patients there, and prays that this will be the lesson Hannah needs to wake up to her bad choices. It is NOT a fun place to be.

As for the boys, they have been living under such pressure, they are literally breathing a huge sigh of relief. The first things they said were, “Mum, you’ll be able to get more sleep. Mum, we don’t have to lock the fridge and the cupboards tonight.” Isn’t that sad? Yes, we have to lock all the food up at night else Hannah gets up and raids. Caleb was like, “I’ll be able to get my schoolwork done in peace.” That poor kid has had to deal with so much verbal abuse from her, he needs time to heal. I know that is not going to happen in 4 days but we have also been trying to get Hannah admitted into a residential care facility for a longer period of time. Paperwork is all in but we just have to wait. She is also scheduled for a neuro psych evaluation. When the original one was done they would not take Fetal Alcohol into consideration which we knows she has. The lady I spoke with today says that this is one of the things they are going to be looking for this time so that is a good thing.

Thanks for letting me vent. I needed to decompress.

Blessings,

Liz

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